I Am Just NOT A Closer

I am a big flirt, but sometimes my mouth writes checks that my tits can't cash (I say tits because I don't have an ass). I can talk all day to a guy about sex; I say penis more than a urologist and vagina more than a gynecologist, but I absolutely CANNOT ask a guy for his number.

I just can't explain it. I don't believe I've ever told you what I do at work, this would be a great time to explain it. I do direct marketing for Home Depot which means I go up to customers and ask them whether they'll like to send a designer out for free to design their kitchen or bathroom. Every day I walk up to random people to convince them to sign up and give me their address. Every day I walk up to random people and ask them to give me their number. Never, have I been bold enough to walk up to a guy I really like and ask for his number.

Perfect example- A couple of weeks ago I was at a friend's graduation/bday party and I was talking to his cousin. The first thing I said to him was, "There's nothing wrong with looking like Kid Cudi, I'd fuck the shit outta Kid Cudi". We were flirting and talking on and off for a little while, I really thought he was cute (I mean he resembles Kid Cudi, can't go wrong with that right?). When he left, I absolutely could NOT ask for his number even though I wanted it SO bad. While I did get his number, I didn't get it on my own. I had to have someone set it up for me...Yeah, I'm a bitch...so sue me!

Today I happened to be super bored at work and I walked up to a guy and said, "You are so hot, and if we weren't at work, you could totally get it", and walked away. If he hadn't had asked me to come back to talk to him, more than likely I would have just eye-fucked him all day and never closed the deal. I got dude's number, (only because he gave it to me, he made it so easy) and we were supposed to go out with him earlier but my co-workers wanted me to go out with them. He's a-fucking-dorable. I've been talking to him on and off all day and he's been gassing me up SO much. I know it's all bullshit, but I don't have any vested interest in him so it doesn't matter. It's not like I have shit else to do.

I DEFINITELY need to work on that, but I love being pursued. Who doesn't like to be wanted? I just have to quit being such a bitch, you can't meet new people without someone asking for the other person's number.