Friday, October 19, 2012

Something new, something old, something new, something old...AGAIN

I think married men is possibly becoming a recurring theme in my life...

When I was in middle school there was this guy named Jeff C. He was the bees knees. We happened to get close when we were younger and he up and disappeared. Found out a couple of weeks later that he moved to VA. Fast forward to June 2007-

Thursday, October 18, 2012

The Common Denominator

As I previously stated, two of my friends were talking. I say "were" bec they're no longer talking, but more on that situation later. For the sake of saving face and also make the story easier to tell Im going to refer to him as, Blue, and her as, Sheesh. Got it? Good.

Upcoming Topic

Jeff; the other not-so-married man


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Monday, October 8, 2012

True Life: I Have an Addiction To GroupOn Deals

I get so happy when I get those damn emails. I've bought so much unnecessary shit from that damn site. I bought one of those idiotic telephone things. I don't even know why I bought that shit. I make fun of people when I see them use it public, but I couldn't ignore it only being $12. I've also bought an iLuv iPod dock for like 20 bucks. It's ridiculous.

Below is a picture of all of the unnecessary shit I just NEEDED to buy




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Talking Dirty After Dark

I know I gave you a brief synopsis of Married Man; here's a more detailed story.

He and I really hit it off when we met. Talking all day-everyday and engaging in ACTIVE conversation. He was sexy as fuck with the cutest dimples and had an unbelievable personality. Finding that we have damn near everything in common and we know a lot of the same people. Shit was great.

Just as most people when they're getting to know each other, they start telling secrets. It's crucial when starting a relationship that you let them in in order to bond with them. I told him about my past relationships, my family, my goals, and simply about me in general.

He happened to tell me he and his ex lived together because "3 months after they moved into the apartment, we broke up and instead of moving out, I'm just living here to help her on the rent. The lease is up in September and I'm moving out then. It's cool because we're on opposite schedules. When I get in she's asleep and when I wake up she's gone"... Since his nickname is Married Man, I think you already know that this was a lie.

As I said we were sharing secrets/interests and such so we happened to start talking about threesomes. I don't remember exactly how we got to this confession but he happened to tell me that he got head from a guy. Said he was horny and the dude ask so he let him. He said it was alight. I was flabbergasted but you can't call anyone out on that shit when you're in the confession stage. Anyway, sugar went to shit; found out he was married and that he was an all around liar.

When shit is good and people are all in like/love you never think about the shit that you tell people. I'm not saying be careful of what you say, but I'm saying be careful in how you treat people in general. You never want to piss off the person who knows that you put your dick in another man's mouth. *Kanye Shrug* #ImJustSaying

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Sunday, October 7, 2012

The Best Thing to Happen to Pregnancy Prevention Since Birth Control

A couple of days ago I got a text from a friend who was panicking because the condom was lost inside her during sex.

Monday, October 1, 2012

Upcoming blog posts

I don't feel like typing on my computer or my phone but I have some things to say. Just so I don't forget...

-Pregnancy avoidance
-Pillow talk and it's side effects
-Common denominator in failed relationships.
-The awesome-ness of the new iPad. (Coming soon)

I'll probably write them tomorrow after I leave the Apple store.

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