Parks & Recre-AWESOME

Since my recent unemployment, I've been watching hella shows on Netflix. I was feeling kinda Randy, Aziz Ansari ( (c)Donald Glover), and decided to check out Parks & Recreation. Back in January when I was in Denver, my roommate Angie was telling me how boss the show was. I was interested, but never gazed upon it, until now.

The show is centered around Leslie Knope (played by Amy Pohler), the deputy director of the Parks and Recreation Department in Pawnee, Indiana. It's done in a "mockumentary" style that's reminiscent of The Office. Knope has an extremely optimistic view of the government and has a really weird obsession with parks. The main focus of the show is "Lot 48" which was an empty pit next to a citizen named Anne's (played by Rashida Jones) house. The lot was originally supposed to be a high-rise, but the developers ran out of money before the project could be completed, thus leaving a huge gaping hole dubbed, 'The Pit'. Anne and was pissed because her boyfriend, Andy, fell into the pit and broke both legs. Leslie, being the lover of parks that she is, decided that this eye-sore could be a park. The show goes through all the bureaucratic red tape that it takes to get the park complete (two seasons in and all they've done is fill it in, and that was only after Andy gave them an ultimatium) and the crazy high-jinks that she and her co-workers go through in their everyday life.

Parks and Rec is comparable to The Office, but what I like more about P&R is that this also deals with the employees' personal life. For example, Tom Haverford (Aziz Ansari) was married to a chick named Wendy. Found out later, that it was a green card marriage (she's from Canada), and that they ended up getting a divorce. Tom fell in love with her 3 days before the divorce was final. Anne and Leslie have a super cool friendship & it'll show them just chilling out on the couch talking and shit. The cameras follow them home instead of verbally telling us about it via 'talking head' or 'one on ones'.

All in all, the show is fuxking boss. I was in love with it from the word, 'Go'. And it doesn't hurt that I get to look at Aziz Ansari sexy ass. He's officially added to my short-list.

P.s.: Aziz Ansari is 5'6 & 3/4"...only 2 inches apart...technically that's still titty height lol.

SHOES!!

Ain't they precious?! Plus, they were only $17...I win!

Death In A Dixie Cup: My Encounter With Liquid Cocaine

So I went up to State to visit Cupcake last week. Friday, the first day I got there, we embarked on a bar crawl. In my four years at Grand Valley, I had never been to a bar crawl. Better late than never.

The second stop of the bar crawl was at a brewery. Cupcake had been talking about a drink name, "Liquid Cocaine", and I figured it would be pretty good since I'm a fan of "Liquid Marijuana". Let me go on record saying this, do not drink Liquid Cocaine unless you don't like your life.

Ah, to be young...Memories

So I was on the phone with the Bestest while he was on his way to work and I got a phone call. The number was blocked, but it didn't matter, I answered it anyway.

*Puts on white person business voice*
"Hello?"
*click*

Now I know that the white person voice didn't throw someone off that much, so I concluded someone was playing on my phone...

Celebrity Apprentice

Is now my shit! I spent the weekend up at State, had a fucking ball btw, and when I woke up this morning Cupcake was watching Celebrity Apprentice. I had never saw the show before, EVER, but I did want to start watching it this season because I knew a lot of the people that were being featured. So here I am, watching the 5th episode, and from then on I was HOOKED.

I'm Too Old For This Shit

So you know how I told you about my ex and his old ass, childish girlfriend (see previous post)? Well, the bitch is nuttier than I thought.

I Googled, "Ghetto black woman" and this came up lmao.

Guys, get it together please...

Sheesh, I don't know where to start. I have this ex named EJ, he ain't shit, no job, never finished school, and doesn't have any aspirations...the epitome of an ain't shit nigga. Aye, aye, AYE! I feel you judging me! Take your white wig off! I was a freshman in college and he was a senior in high school, so he had potential to be more. He just decided to not do shit.

He, like so many other of my exes/friends, called me today and asked me for relationship advice. He was telling me that his girl is super jealous, is always angry with him, and just blows up about small stuff. Nothing really out the ordinary right? She seems like a pretty normal chick right? Well, just wait.